Good excuses to not hang out
The term “me time” exists for a reason, and we can all agree that these are the moments that we secretly look forward to. Whether you’re introverted, extroverted, or somewhere along the spectrum, it is hard to say no to some quality time with your thoughts.
At some point, you might feel like you’d want to just tuck in and curl up with a good book instead of going out with your friends on a busy Saturday night. It could also be because your position on the couch is too comfortable or your favourite show is having a rerun on a particular channel. Either way, it becomes increasingly hard for people to prepare, much less stand up.
What makes it worse is that people find it rude to hear that you just don’t want to hang out at that particular time. If this is the case, you might’ve thought of several reasons already on what to say as to why you won’t be able to hang out. It is tough to think of one, we know, and finding that perfect balance between reasonable and believable is what you’d want to make your friends understand.
Luckily, we have prepared some of the best excuses to make your “me time” as discreet as possible.
Tell them that you’re feeling under the weather
No one would ever force someone sick to go out and party with them. This is one of the top foolproof excuses to get out of hanging out with your friends when you’re in the middle of binge-watching your favourite TV series.
“I am not feeling well, maybe I’ll take a rain check for now.”
It sounds simple, but it is deceptively effective. Just make sure that when they ask questions, you’d be able to answer them. It’ll unravel rather quickly if you won’t be able to answer what it is you’re currently feeling. Simply insert a few details here and there like colds, a bit of a cough, and you’re good to go.
Don’t use anything serious though. You don’t want them coming over either to take care of you.
Say that you’re busy and you have a lot to do
This is not something that we’d usually recommend as this would introduce a lot of questions that could either strengthen your excuse or break it down in a few seconds. Respecting boundaries is an integral part of friendship, and saying that you’re busy doing something will make your friends understand your situation.
“Sorry, it’s just that I have a lot of things to do right now. Maybe next time?”
However, they may also ask questions like, “what’s keeping you busy,” or “maybe we could help, what could we do.” At that point, you might panic and blurt out statements that don’t make sense and effectively expose your true intentions. If you find yourself in this situation, DO NOT PANIC.
Trust me, it won’t help.
Just thank them for their offer, and inform them that you’d be working on your project by yourself. Including lines like “let’s just catch up on another day” or “I’ll just see you next week” will be even better to let them know that you’re still interested. It might be a white lie, but there are still etiquettes in place.
The classic “family emergency” excuse
“Hey, I just have this family emergency and they really need me right now”
Rating? Perfect. Family emergencies are the epitome of white lies. It is just perfect throughout. It doesn’t encourage questions, your friends would understand instantly, and you don’t even have to explain yourself that much. One line is all you need, and you’re done.
Of course, this would still need a few details just to make the lie consistent when you see your friends next time. You may tell them that when you arrived it wasn’t a big deal, or that the situation wasn’t that serious. This is just to reassure them that you’re feeling well and that whatever emergency you attended to is now resolved. Neat, right?
Emphasize how terrible the traffic will be
This is pretty risky considering how overused this excuse is. This is pretty popular for people who need to take the bus to get to the agreed-upon location, only to be stuck in traffic for a few hours. In this case, you might want to phrase your excuse well to not trigger any doubts about your interest to hang out.
“I think the traffic looks bad at this time in our area. Do you think we could reschedule to a less busy day?”
This excuse combines a suggestion and a lie to make it more believable. This emphasizes your willingness to go combined with the additional hassle of taking the bus due to the traffic. It is risky in the sense that your friends could just say that they’ll pick you up at your house. At that point, you’d have no choice but to go.
It is not perfect for sure. However, we thought that this classic excuse is still one to use when there’s just no other excuse to stay at home. Just remember: technique is key in this case.
Tell them that someone is coming over
Whether it is a friend, a relative, or someone rather close to you who is coming over, saying that you would be having a house guest is a direct implication that you would need to be there to meet them. As such, it is an effective excuse when you’re trying to make some last-hour cancellations for your hang out.
“Hey, my mom is coming to town later. It’s sudden, I know, but I don’t think I would be able to come.”
By trying to introduce a scenario that forces you to stay at home, your friend would automatically reconsider your plans and allow you to blow off your trip. However, you should also make sure that whoever you’re talking to is not familiar with your other close friends or relatives. They may want to meet them as well and at that point, you’d be juggling two problems at once. What’s worse is if they knew that your relatives are not coming and they find out that you’re lying. I’m not sure how you’re going to get away from that one.
Say that you have an event to attend
When you forget that you’ve had a prior commitment on that same day that you’re about to hang out with your friend, you’d tell them as soon as you remembered. This is what you need to emulate to get that perfect excuse.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I forgot that I need to go to _______. Can we go out on another day instead?”
There should be a sense of urgency in your message to make it more believable. Of course, it isn’t, but it should be at least believable if you’re committed to continuing the 3rd season of your TV show. Nevertheless, you should be able to apologize (of course) and inform them of the complete details of the event. It would help if you could give a little anecdote as to how you forgot. Make it interesting at least, or maybe remove it completely if you’re not confident with the story that you made up. Either way, remember that everything lies in the details.
Pretend to fall asleep. High risk but is also high reward.
This is pretty interesting, and at this point, you’re already aware of what we are talking about. Pretending to fall asleep or simply ignoring the messages and calls of your friend when it’s time to hangout is exceptionally rude but is also equally effective. We don’t recommend this as this might introduce problems between you and your friends but if you want to blow off the hang out, this is the sure-fire way to do it. You just need to…not respond. Of course, it is customary to send a message when you’ve “woken up” but apart from that, there’s nothing else that you need to do.
“I’m so sorry, I totally fell asleep and lost track of time.”
See? Definitely rude! But also effective! You should also remember that this should not be used consecutively as this would reflect on your attitude badly. Try sprinkling around 3 or 5 of these over 10 hangouts and you’ll probably be safe from harsh comments. However, we would like to reiterate that THIS IS RUDE. It is effective, but don’t use it excessively. You know, be nice once in a while.
“Forget” about your plans.
This is as bad as the last one, but this would take a little more effort. It is also a little less effective as there is a lot of room for your friends to still make you go. You’d pretend as if you have forgotten about the event and simply respond when you’re contacted. It would happen around 30 minutes after your scheduled hangout, and at that point, you should have already thought of a secondary excuse as to why you would not be able to go.
Think of it as a combination of “forgetting” about the plan, and one of the excuses listed here. For example, when you’re contacted as to why you are late, you could respond with, “Oh God, that was today? I totally forgot!” You should then follow that up with any other excuse such as, “I’m sorry I could not come, I wasn’t aware so I said yes to my mom coming here.”
By doing this, you’re removing the possibility of your friends convincing you to catch up with them. It makes for a pretty solid excuse but then again, you would have to respond. Everything could go wrong during that conversation, and that’s what you need to watch out for.
Suggest another day for your hang out.
This is another excuse that should be used as a combination with other excuses listed here. Think of this point as the buffer that keeps you as your friends’ friend and not completely let you shift to being the hated acquaintance.
“Can we reschedule? How about tomorrow instead?”
By simply letting them know that you’re looking for another date to have your hang out, they are informed that you are still interested and that you’re just preoccupied at that particular time. It makes whatever lie you use sound less rude, you could say. Nevertheless, this shouldn’t even be suggested as it is a common courtesy when cancelling on your friends. Come on, it doesn’t take much to be nice.
Allergies. That’s it.
We’ve all been there. We could all agree that allergies are the worst. It makes your nose itchy, makes you sneeze all the time, makes your face and eyes look puffy, and generally makes you experience the worst day of your life. It is completely uncomfortable, and your friends are also aware of that. This fact makes this excuse one of the most effective ones out there.
“I don’t think I would be able to come. Allergies.”
It’s not even a complete explanation of your condition, but they would instantly understand what you’re trying to say. As soon as they hear “allergies,” you’d instantly receive a “get well soon” message, and that’s when you know that you nailed it. You could also pretend to sneeze and have a clogged nose if they called, just to make it a little more authentic. Other than that, all you have to do is just thank them for their concern.
Pretending to have received a last-minute call from work
Everybody’s aware that when work stuff comes knocking, it is not something that you can casually shrug off and ignore. With this in mind, this excuse would give you the space that you so desperately want.
“Office just called. I’d have to cancel to finish my work first, sorry.”
It is simple and concise, but it gives your friends an idea of how hard your situation is and why you needed to cancel on them. Of course, all of this is not true, but it makes for an effective excuse to keep yourself comfortable at home. No questions, no complaints, just plain acknowledgement, and probably a little pity for your situation. You should note that this could only be used on people who are either not working in the same company or those who are not overly familiar with your work situation. It might raise a few questions when your office called although your work does not involve any outside tasks. That would instantly unravel your entire lie in a matter of seconds.
Try not to use it as much though. You wouldn’t want to have an overused excuse when your office calls at some point. Believe me, it does happen to everyone.
Grounded. Need I explain more?
This might seem silly at first, but for teenagers who have strict parents? This is nothing new. Being grounded is common knowledge to everyone, and everyone knows that when you’re grounded, your feet will not leave the premises of your home lest your phone is taken away for a month. No one would wish that on their enemy, much less their friend.
“I’m sorry, I’m grounded right now. Went home late last week.”
This excuse would probably leave you as the laughingstock of the group for a few weeks, but you probably already recognized that being laughed at is better than missing out on that hot cup of tea that you’ve been brewing. What’s better is that if you only seldom see your friends, you won’t have any problems when you see each other again. It’s pretty neat, but it’s pretty basic. If you’re looking for an adventurous excuse to use, this might not be the one for you. Nevertheless, you can never go wrong with a classic, especially one that works so well.
Tell them that you’re having something repaired at your home
It is imperative that if someone is going to come to repair something at your home, you should be there to oversee the procedure. Nothing else takes priority, especially if you’re finicky with everything that’s going on in your house. It might encourage a few questions especially when they realize that you scheduled a repair on the same day of your hang out. However, you could always use a few additional cliché excuses such as the repair being accidental, or that you somehow forgot that you had something planned for that day, and so on.
“Someone’s coming over to repair the pipes. I don’t think I would be able to come on time. Could we move it to a later day instead?”
This combines ingenuity and a little attachment to clichés as this uses a common excuse along with the inclusion of a movement suggestion. This tiny suggestion prevents any possible hangouts within the day, letting you enjoy whatever it is you’re doing without worrying that your friends might reach out a few hours later. It might seem simple, but there’s a little bit of psychology to it. Besides, who forces their friends to hang out when a stranger is traipsing in their place? For the record, I wouldn’t.
Make the weather the point of your excuse
This is probably the excuse that is hard to use, but when the conditions are met, is just so convenient and just so easy to pull off. Making the weather the point of your excuse is to use the inconvenience of having a thunderstorm or having a heavy snowfall to make your time convenient and utilized on what you want to spend it on. By simply pointing out the weather, you’ll be able to inform your friends that the weather itself is keeping you locked in and that unless it changes in a second, the thought of you hanging out together is next to impossible.
“The rain is just so heavy in here, I don’t think I would be able to safely go there.”
With this excuse, you are not subject to a lot of doubt and questions, however, it will only work if you’re not living close to your friend. If you’re not that far from them, this excuse would just be a glaring lie that would be considered rude by anyone who receives them. Again, it needs certain conditions to be used. The weather might be unpredictable, but you could always improvise as it comes and goes.
In a nutshell…
It is not easy to blatantly lie to your friends, especially if you’ve all shared very memorable experiences in the past or if you’ve been acquainted for a few years now, still staying strong throughout all the challenges in life. It is indeed preferable to simply tell them the truth of your reasons for not hanging out, but a white lie would certainly avoid any unnecessary strong feelings that might end up causing a larger rift later on. By trying to be considerate of their feelings while also being considerate of yours, you’re all reaping the benefits of this charade.
In cases where it is not really within your alley to lie straight up to your friends, you could always consider telling them the truth, or simply informing them that you’d like to be alone at that moment. It might be perceived negatively, but the key is always in how you deliver. If you feel like you deserve some alone time with your thoughts and with your feelings, a good friend would always respect that preference and give you some time. Lying is not always the solution to every problem, and it should definitely not be used often. However, if you find yourself in a tight spot, you could always refer to some of these excuses to get out of that corner. We can’t probably stress this enough, but always do you and what feels normal to you.