Research has shown that several workers have experienced being talked about either by their coworkers or boss when they are away. Gossips are one of the things we have to deal with when we are in the midst of others, especially if they are not well-mannered. These seeds bring striving among colleagues and friends. It becomes worse when it is from someone you least expected. It assassinates the character. Whether a gossip is true or not, no matter who is involved in the gossip, it isn’t something to be condoned. Gossip must be handled as every other offense against human dignity. Let us know ‘Boss Talks About Me To Other Employees’.
How do you handle a boss that talks about you to other employees?
Keep quiet and walk away? Or confront him or her? It is against labor ethics to have a colleague talk against a colleague at work and talk less of a boss. If an employee has a questionable character or is not living up to demands in their role, it is not a subject to be discussed with other colleagues. The party involved should be addressed directly, but what happens when the reverse is the case? You can choose to express how you feel to them or request intervention from other top officials in your office.
Why A Boss Will Talk About His Employee To Others?
Irrespective of what may happen in the office. If a boss is caught talking about his employees to others, it shows a sign of insecurity on the boss. It means that there is something spectacular about the employee which the boss is trying to get in the way. While the boss might do this to tarnish the image of the employee, other employees should be aware that they are not safe either.
A boss talking about you to others might indicate a sign of hatred and probably that they don’t want your presence in the workplace.
To feel important. Some boss gets into this act to prove to other colleagues that they know so much about you forgetting that they are hurting you.
Effects Of A Boss Talking About You To Other Employees
While the boss might feel it is right to let out sensitive information about his employees to others. This act is disastrous as it can cause more harm than expected.
The chief effect of having a boss talk about you to others is that it will affect other people’s perception of you, especially when they believe the gossip. You might end up attracting foes in the workplace than friends, especially if what was said was believed by others.
It can also impede promotion. If your boss is trusted by the top officials in the organization and he lets out information against you whether it’s true or not, it will affect your growth in the organization.
How To Handle A Boss That Speaks Against You To Other Employees?
Having gossip as a boss is a sensitive issue and must be addressed with care. The truth remains that gossip is harassment from your boss and must be handled as it ought to. Here are twelve tips you can apply in addressing the issue.
1. Keep a record of the frequency of occurrence
It will be risky to address an issue if you have no evidence, especially when it relates to your leader. If the boss talks against you in your presence to others or does it behind you, you are privileged to have this information. It’s best to journal the date, time, the issue discussed, and the parties involved in the conversation. This will be an important tool for investigation if you choose to take up the issue with the top management or security.
2. Engage the boss in a conversation
A boss who talks about you to other employees is actively involved in verbal bullying against you. The choice to let go of it or address it is completely yours. If you choose to handle it, you should engage him in a conversation to let him know your stance about his attitude towards you. While on this, be careful not to be confrontational, and be discrete in your presentation as much as you can. Irrespective of what transpired, he is still your boss.
3. Call the attention of the human resource department
The human resource department is not only saddled with the responsibility of staff recruitment but the welfare of the staff. Their role cuts across the staff treatment and ensures that the office is safe for every staff. In a situation where the issue is alarming, and you have tried to sort it out with your boss, it meets a dead end. Go a step further by writing officially to the human resource management for proper investigation.
4. Recommended staff development training
Some bosses might find it disrespectful to have their staff confront them on such issues or even human resources. If your organization is such that places priority on personnel training, suggest general training to remind everyone about their work ethics and how to create a safe work environment for every staff member. This will have a way of addressing the issue indirectly without pointing it out to your boss directly.
5. Refrain from getting intimate with your boss
If the information shared about you from your boss to others are private issues you shared it with them out of trust. You can not take back those words but you can advise yourself not to make them a part of your private life any longer. Refrain from letting them know about sensitive issues about you and only share necessary information that may affect your work with caution.
6. Avoid being confrontational
Noone supports a bully as a boss. You can not win the battle by being confrontational or treating them the same way they are treating you. Don’t engage in any form of gossip against them. It will worsen the situation or go ahead to prove to others that the information they shared against you was the truth. Respect them as much as you can while trying to figure out the best way to handle the issue.
7. Address the issue at the scene
The best way to handle gossip is to address it while the conversation is on. If the issue was reported to you by another colleague, find out how and when it took place and ask them to carry you along when next it’s taking place. This will help you to show up at the scene and end it just there and then.
8. Ask for a change of department
If your immediate boss is involved in talking about you and attempts to have him stop the harassment prove abortive. You can request a department change to ensure you are at your best in your work. If this does not work, you may have to practice not entertaining any information about the things he says behind you or accept his personality as gossip and focus on your job.
9. Know the extent to which the conversation has gone
Handling a boss who talks about you to others will also depend on the extent to which what he says about you has gone. As much as you are not supposed to leave your job to inquire about what he has said about you, paying attention to conversations around the office will keep you in the know about your line of action.
10. Talk to other colleagues about it
If other of your colleagues are already responding to you based on the information delve about you from your boss, you should let them know that the issue is not true and point them to the truth surrounding the information they may hear
11. Change your office
This will be the last point of the call depending on the nature of the issue at hand. Working with toxic people is not advisable. If you can’t withstand the hurt his or her attitude is causing you, it’s advisable to work out of the organization. This doesn’t mean that you are weak, it’s a sign that you value your integrity more than the material benefits you are receiving from the organization.
12. Don’t listen to the conversation
It might be difficult to do this, but the best approach to handling gossip in the workplace from a boss is not to seek to know what he says in your absence. Though, it’s not several people that can do this. Once they notice that they can get at you with the gossip, they’ll call themselves to order.
When To Confront A Boss That Talks About You To Other Employees?
This depends on the individual that is concerned. Some workers may choose not to pay attention to whatever is being said concerning them by the boss while others would choose to end the matter.
If you belong to the latter, the best time to put a stop to the gossip is once you get to hear it. Request a meeting with him in his office and politely state your stance on the issue. Remember, to keep it official said don’t engage in a verbal fight.
You can also confront the issue while he is in the act to let the coworker he’s speaking understand that what he’s saying is a lie.
Effects Of A Boss Talking About His Employee On The Organization
When a boss talks about his employee to others even when it is within the work environment. It doesn’t only affect the individual concerned it goes ahead to affect the organization at large.
This act will breed bitterness and envy among team members and this doesn’t go well with the organization as its workforce is divided.
This will also breed distrust among team members and this can be disastrous to the organization. You’ll never know who to trust or confide in any longer. The company’s sensitive information is also at stake as it can also be divulged to strangers.
No smoke comes without a fire. If your boss is speaking about you in a manner you do not like to other colleagues, confronting him outrightly is not the best way to handle the issue. You should first seek to know why he is doing that and go ahead with engaging him in a conversation about and also involve the human resource department. If efforts to end the act prove abortive, it’s best to change your work environment to an organization whose values align with yours and don’t fail to let them know why you left your previous employ.
Frequently Asked Questions
Will I be punished if I confront my boss for speaking about me to other colleagues?
This depends on the code of ethics that governs your organization. No matter how hurtful you may feel about his reaction to you remember to confront it discretely to avoid being on the losing side at the end of the day.
How should gossip be handled in the workplace?
The parties engaged in the gossip should be cautioned by the human resource department. If they cease to refrain from the act, it’s best to relieve them from their work else they’ll pollute the whole system with gossip.
Should I resign from my job if my boss keeps talking about me?
While this might be considered depending on how intense the situation is, this should not be your first point of call. If it’s something you can no longer withstand it’s wise to leave.
How do I handle a boss that keeps talking about other colleagues to me?
If your boss keeps talking about other colleagues to you, you have to help him desist from the act using any of these strategies;
A. Introduce any subject and divert his attention from the conversation.
B. Don’t contribute to the conversation. If you engage in the conversation you are encouraging him to continue.
C. Depending on your level of relationship with them, let him know that the attitude is not right and how it will affect his status as the leader.