Sharing your bed with a pet can deepen your bond, provide comfort, and help you both feel more secure. It can also disrupt sleep if not managed well. This guide covers the practical steps to make co-sleeping work for you and your furry friend, from setting up the right sleeping arrangement to troubleshooting common issues like restlessness or waking up sore.
What You’ll Need
- A bed large enough for both of you (at least a queen size if you’re sharing with a larger pet)
- Washable bedding (mattress protector, sheets, and a pet blanket or pad)
- A designated pet spot (a specific corner, a pet bed on the bed, or a blanket just for them)
- Pet-safe cleaning supplies (enzyme cleaner for accidents)
- A consistent bedtime routine for your pet (a final potty break, a calm walk, or a short play session)
- A brush or lint roller for fur management
- Optional: a ramp or stairs if your pet is small, senior, or has joint issues
Step-by-Step
- Start with a clean, well-rested pet. Take your dog for a final walk or play session, and ensure your cat has used the litter box. A tired pet is more likely to settle down and sleep through the night.
- Set up a designated sleeping zone. Place a pet blanket, pad, or small bed on top of your comforter in a spot that won’t be in your way. This gives your pet a clear boundary and helps contain fur and dirt.
- Establish a consistent bedtime routine. Just like humans, pets thrive on routine. Do the same things in the same order each night: a short walk, a treat, and then getting into bed. This signals to your pet that it’s time to sleep.
- Invite your pet onto the bed. Use a clear cue like “up” or “bed” and reward them with a treat when they settle on their designated spot. If they move to another area, gently guide them back.
- Use a calm, quiet voice. Speak softly and avoid exciting play once you’re in bed. The goal is to wind down, not ramp up.
- Create a comfortable temperature. Pets often run warmer than humans, so you may need to lower the thermostat slightly or use lighter bedding. Keep a corner of the blanket free for your pet to burrow or stick their head out.
- Manage fur and allergens. Brush your pet before bed to reduce loose hair. Wash your bedding weekly in hot water to keep allergens and odors at bay. A good quality mattress protector will also help.
- Be consistent. If you allow your pet on the bed, let them stay all night. If you sometimes kick them off, they’ll be anxious and restless. Decide on the rules and stick to them.
- Monitor your sleep quality. After a week, ask yourself: Am I waking up rested? Is my pet sleeping well? If either of you is not, adjust the arrangement (e.g., move your pet to a different spot, or consider a pet bed on the floor next to yours).
Common Mistakes
- Letting your pet rule the bed. If your pet sprawls diagonally, pushes you to the edge, or hogs the pillow, you’ll both sleep poorly. Gently but firmly move them to their designated spot.
- Ignoring allergies. If you or a partner is allergic, co-sleeping can worsen symptoms. Consider a high-efficiency particulate air (HEPA) filter, wash bedding more often, and keep your pet’s face away from your face.
- Allowing playtime in bed. If your pet thinks the bed is a playground, they’ll want to play at 2 a.m. Keep the bed for sleeping only.
- Not having a backup plan. If your pet gets sick, has an accident, or you have a guest who is allergic, you need a plan. Have a comfortable pet bed ready on the floor.
- Forgetting to trim nails. Long nails can snag on sheets and scratch you. Keep your pet’s nails trimmed regularly.
Tips
- Start with a trial period. Try co-sleeping for a week and evaluate. It’s easier to change habits early than after months of bad sleep.
- Use a separate blanket for your pet. This can help with heat and fur, and makes it easier to wash just their blanket.
- Keep a consistent wake-up time. Pets learn your schedule. If you get up at the same time each morning, your pet will adjust and be less likely to wake you early.
- Consider your pet’s age and health. Puppies and kittens may need nighttime bathroom breaks. Senior pets may need help getting on and off the bed. Adjust accordingly.
- If you have a partner, discuss it first. Both partners should agree on the arrangement. One person may be a light sleeper or allergic.
Troubleshooting
My pet keeps moving around or waking me up. This often means they’re not tired enough. Increase daytime exercise and ensure they have a comfortable, cool spot. If they’re restless, they may need a potty break.
My pet growls or snaps when I move them. This is a sign of resource guarding. Do not punish them. Instead, work on positive reinforcement training, and consider consulting a professional dog trainer or animal behaviorist.
I wake up with allergies or asthma symptoms. Wash your bedding more frequently, use allergen-proof covers on pillows and mattress, and keep your pet out from under the covers. If symptoms persist, talk to a doctor.
My pet sleeps on my pillow or under the covers and I can’t breathe. Gently redirect them to their own spot. You can use a body pillow to create a physical barrier.
My pet has an accident in bed. Don’t punish them. Clean the area thoroughly with an enzyme cleaner to remove the smell. If it happens repeatedly, check with your vet to rule out a medical issue.
My partner suddenly wants the pet off the bed. This is a common conflict. Compromise by placing a pet bed on the floor next to yours, or moving the pet to a different room. The key is to communicate and find a solution that works for everyone.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it safe to sleep with a baby and a pet? No. It’s generally recommended not to let pets sleep in the same bed as an infant or toddler due to risks of suffocation or accidental injury. Keep the pet out of the crib or bassinet, and consider keeping the pet off the bed entirely until the child is older.
Will sleeping with my pet make me sick? The risk is low for healthy adults, but it does exist. Pets can carry parasites or bacteria, and they can introduce allergens. Regular vet care, flea prevention, and good hygiene (washing hands after petting) reduce the risk.
Can sleeping with my pet worsen my sleep? It can, especially if your pet moves a lot, snores, or takes up space. Studies show mixed results; some people report better sleep with a pet, others worse. Pay attention to your own sleep quality and adjust accordingly.
What if my pet is a puppy or kitten? They may need a bathroom break in the middle of the night. Set an alarm to take them out, and gradually increase the time between breaks. Once they’re fully house-trained, they can sleep through the night.
How do I keep my pet from getting too hot? Pets can overheat under heavy blankets. Keep the room cool, provide a lightweight blanket for them, and make sure they can move to a cooler spot if needed. Watch for signs of overheating like panting or restlessness.
My pet is very old and has trouble getting on the bed. What should I do? Provide a ramp or stairs to make it easier. If they have arthritis, consider a memory foam pet bed on the floor next to yours. You can also place a soft mat at the foot of the bed for them to use.