According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, an average American works for more than 40 hours a week. Almost seven hours per day, and when you are spending time with your boss every day, it’s not surprising if you start feeling something in your heart. Let us see if you will get fired for Dating your boss or not in this article.
Can You Get Fired for Dating Boss?
A survey by Job site vault reports that around 58% of employees have dated their colleague or boss at some point in their Job. Feelings and relationships come with a burden, and if you are seeing someone at the workplace. There are moral and ethical dilemmas and sometimes company policies. Even if you want to go discreet, it’s not that easy to hide something that shows on your face and through your actions.
The Legal dilemma of Dating at Workplace
It is not illegal to date your boss or someone from work. There is no such legal law that prohibits dating your boss, but the catch is that many companies have policies against a relationship between a supervisor and a subordinate and strict protocols for workplace dating. For example, dating your supervisor in the Armed forces can get you fired.
In simple terms, you can date your boss if that’s what you want to but prepare yourself for the repercussions of such relationships. If an employee handbook clearly states that you cannot date your boss then, be ready to lose your job because you are liable for breaking employee terms of a contract. Hence go through your employee handbook, offer letter, and read the clauses regarding relationships in the office before you decide to pursue a relationship with your boss.
Between an office romance and a Career Demand
Dating your Boss or supervisor is not very beneficial for your career in the long run. A romantic feeling between you and your Boss will affect your relationship with other colleagues. Your hard work might be misunderstood as a favor by the Boss. You might be asked to change departments. In the end, one of you might need to change your workplace to continue dating. Even worse is a break-up and then facing your Ex every day in the office.
What if you love your job and are not willing to change departments or quit the job for the sake of a relationship. Hence before you start dating your boss, think and reflect on whether it’s worth risking your career for dating your boss.
The Consequences of dating your Boss
Butterflies in the stomach, Aroma in the air, beauty everywhere, Maybe that’s how it feels to fall for someone, but not in the workplace because you have to consider other factors such as office ethics, seniority, age gap, etc. Along with that, you will become the center of gossip for dating your boss.
1. Getting fired/ a warning:
Many companies have a flexible policy when it comes to relationships between colleagues, but not so flexible when it comes to dating between a subordinate or supervisor. You might be asked about your relationship/dating with your boss or colleague, and you can get fired if the company wants to. Sometimes you might receive a warning from HR and ask to shift departments or explore some other possibility where both of you have less interaction.
You will become the center of attention at your workplace if you are dating your boss. Your co-workers might avoid being friendly with you. People will call you names behind your back. Your colleagues will avoid telling you things, thinking you might discuss this with your boss. The worst thing that can happen is your hard work will be labeled as a favor by the boss because Well! You are dating each other.
3. The space between personal and work life:
When you are dating your boss, the space between your work and personal life can get blurred. You will end up discussing work on your dates. Your boss will be everywhere in your life. You might end up caving for some personal space at the end of the day. Hence think before you date that boss.
4. Harassment and other effects:
In the wake of the MeToo movements, workplaces are adopting anti-harassment policies, and that is the primary reason why companies might be against you dating your boss. A failed relationship can lead to sexual harassment or discrimination, and somewhere you will find yourself alone in all these situations. Many companies also ask their employees to sign an agreement stating that the relationship is consensual.
5. Distractions and discretion:
When you like someone, your brain will automatically think about them, and if that someone is beside you then, you will be easily distracted throughout your work. You might think of being discreet about your relationship, which will cause even more problems where you might think of secretly meeting each other or that ‘I miss you’ kind of eye lock. Get ready to lag at work when you date your boss.
Your Ex will be the last person you would want to see at your workplace, and that’s where a relationship with your boss can get ugly. A breakup and you will have to risk everything: your job, your colleagues, and most importantly, your reputation.
Dating your boss is dicey. Think and conclude whether it is worth going with your heart or you should be practical because the strongest relationships can crumble under pressure.
How to date your boss when the heart wants what it wants?
You have tried everything from being practical to avoiding your feelings with your boss, but nothing seems to be working, and you want to have this relationship because you feel it’s worth the risk.
If you and your boss have decided to give your relationship a chance and date. Then, think if one of you can quit or shift departments. Trust me, your dating life will be easy, and you can maintain the distance between work and personal life.
Policy on relationships:
Once you start dating your boss then, do not forget to read through the company policies about dating in the office. If your employee handbook does not mention this clause, have a word with your HR about dating in the office.
Don’t be discreet:
While keeping your relationship under the wraps sounds reasonable but it might not be in your favor in the long run. If you are serious about your relationship then, let your colleagues and HR know about it. Just tell them that you are seeing each other and would like to have your privacy about this relationship.
Say no to PDA:
Public display of affection might sound romantic, but not in the office. Maintain decorum when you are at your workplace. Avoid meeting each other in the office without any official reason, and reserve your affection for after office hours.
Remember your position:
Whether you are dating your immediate superior or your Boss. Remember that does not give you an advantage over other employees. Hence don’t act as if you hold some power just because you are dating your Boss. Do your work at your workplace and leave when everyone leaves.
Maintain your performance:
You should never let your dating life affect your work. So maintain your performance and perform diligently at work. This will help you avoid unnecessary gossip regarding your relationship with your boss.
Be clear about your intentions when dating. Don’t date your boss to get promoted or for some advantage, and make sure your boss does the same. When you are risking everything for a relationship then, be clear about your intentions. What does your job mean to you, and what does your relationship mean to you?
To date or not to date?
Dating your boss comes with more disadvantages than benefits. Dating your boss will not only risk your job but also that of your boss. The heart is a silly thing. Sometimes you cannot stop thinking of someone and want to spend your life with them. If that’s what you feel for your boss or an office colleague then, don’t let anything stop you because there’s always a way to figure out things.
If you and your boss are not clear about the relationship and it’s just a fling, then you can have a fling with anyone. Why do you want to risk your job to pursue an infatuation with your boss? Make sure you both are serious about each other before you start dating.
These days many companies have policies against dating your boss, You can get fired even at Google for such relationships. Read your employee handbook properly. Prioritize your career first, and if you feel you are stable enough and want to take the risk then, change your job or department before you pursue your dating career with your boss. Sometimes it’s just mere infatuation or liking because you spend a lot of time together working. So, think about all the factors before you get into that dating zone.
Frequently asked questions:
1. Can I file a lawsuit against my employer if he fired me for dating my boss?
A. Although it’s not against the law to date your boss, it can be against your company’s policy. So a lawsuit will only land you in trouble for breaking your employee terms of the contract.
2. Can I get fired for dating my colleague?
A. No, you won’t get fired, but you might not find any space between your professional and personal career if you date anyone from the office. Think before you decide.